Friday, June 30, 2006

CoTex Day 1 - Friday

So we finally got our butts out of bed on Friday morning, or, should I say, WET SPOT and I finally got out of bed. Of course, DUSTBALLS had already been up, showered, packed and was ready to go by the time we got up. Damn military folk. The girls got ready, loaded up the car and we headed out to find the liquor store that BUTT DARTS had told us about because WET SPOT needed some tequila for her margaritas. We pulled up and saw one of those "be back at this time" signs hanging in the door. It was only gonna be about 30 minutes, so we decided to eat real quick and return. But as luck would have it, nobody had come to open up shop yet when we checked back! By now there were several other folks waiting in the parking lot for it to open up. Apparently, we weren't the only ones wanting to get our drink on. :) We decided they weren't going to be getting our business anymore because we wanted to get on the road to Ruidoso. I then noticed I had missed a couple of calls from Wanker Boy. Seems he was bailing due to bald tires, mechanical issues, etc. Whatever the reason, I was no longer going to have my winnings delivered to me that I had been expecting...a bottle of Colorado Vodka. So now I needed a liquor store as well.

Along the way we tried to stop at this cool looking place in the middle of nowhere...before you get to Alamogordo, NM. It looked like a bar that also sold liquor to go. Bonus! We were ready to have a cold brew in a local bar when whammy....it wasn't open yet. Guess they were still working on constructing the inside. DUSTY decided this was a perfect time for a smoke break, so I took some pics and then we were off.



I think it was Alamodorgo where we stopped again and tried to find some liquor to buy. We never saw any liqour stores, but we saw a sign at a gas station. They had a very small collection, but then told us that grocery stores in New Mexico sold liquor! The lady gave us directions to where some store was in Tularosa and we were off. This town was the location of an establishment that made me laugh my ass off. Wish I would have talked Dusty into turning around so I could've taken a picture of the sign.... It said, "Donuts and Burritos." Then I saw the name of the restaurant....it was called Yum Yum Restaurant! Holy crap...I could not stop laughing!!!

So we finally found the little grocery store and made our purchases. Yeah! Ruidoso here we come! We made one more stop along the way, which turned out to be quite close to our destination. It was a casino with a convenient store attached to it. Found some Diet Rockstar to mix with my newly purchased vodka...I needed some pep.

We made it into Ruidoso soon after and as we were driving through the main part of town, WET SPOT noticed some hashers coming out of an establishment...a bar, of course! Turns out they were my future cabin mates that I hadn't met yet. They were cruising around town on their bikes. Anyway, Ruidoso is such a cute town. These little carved bears are everywhere. I just love 'em! I wish we would have arrived earlier so we could have toured the town. But by the time we checked in there were others congregating outside the hashpitality suite, so we decided to hang out and start meeting everyone. Soon after, WET SPOT pulled out her dice and a game of 3-Man began. Others started arriving and then I saw MEATGAZER! Hadn't seen her since March at Texas Interhash. Love that crazy fun girl. :)

Then I saw WANKSGIVING and realized I wasn't the lone Austinite who made the journey to CoTex.

Team Austin!

Funny shirt someone had on

For dinner the ABQ folks treated us to quesadillas, green chile stew and some other goodies. Everything was delicious. Think it was time to go change for the pub crawl. I mixed a fresh vodka drink and met everyone outside again. And we were off. Being the photo loving chic that I am, I came across this store that sold tons of those carved bears, so I wanted my picture with them. That turned out to be a saving grace because immediately after taking pics, BBC came up to us and said to dump out any alcoholic beverages we had in our mugs. Apparently, some Ruidoso cops were writing tickets to some of our hasher buds just ahead. Thanks for the warning BBC! I had to down some big gulps of my drink and then pour out the rest. We then safely made it to the first beer check.

At the first bar, some folks got out on the dance floor and two-stepped. WET SPOT made friends with the DJ, so he played some requested songs for her. The Cotton Eyed Joe song was some crazy techno version, but everyone seemed to keep up ok. Then a few brave souls attempted the Cha-Cha Slide. I had never even heard of this dance until TX Interhash this past March. But I guess Spotty loves it! Anyway, it was then time to head out to the next beer check.

Our 2nd stop was at the Coyote Cantina. While at the bar, a local guy named Lindsey talked us into ordering Irish Car Bomb shots. I thought he was gonna do one with us, but no! I thought they were pretty gross. We ended up chatting with him for a while and then found out this place had a downstairs area with cigars and another bar area, just we immediately went down to check out the "secret area." The hashers took over and we had a great time.

On-On to the last beer check. Can't remember what it was called, but it was here that I met 2 of Lindsey's friends...one being Jonathan a.k.a. "Jennifer's Dad." He wanted to 2-step, so I said sure. But soon learned he had no idea what he was doing and was just stomping all over the place. And when I say stomp, I mean stomping really high where his knees were coming up higher than his waist. It was truly a hilarious sight. Unfortunately, it "offended the bartender." For real you ask? YES. This bald bouncer guy came over to him, while WET SPOT was trying to teach him how to properly 2-step, and told him he had to leave. Pretty ridiculous if you ask me, but I guess the country folk inside thought he was making fun of them? Who knows. So soon after that, a group of us bailed to head back to the cabins. As luck would have it, the light rain had turned into a total downpour. Oh well, nothing we could do about it now. So we just strolled back through the town to our cabins, getting drenched the entire way.

Back at my cabin, I soon saw the others returning from the bar...via the back of some pickup truck. Losers had to get a ride. The funny thing was who else got out of the truck. Jennifer's Dad! He had talked someone into stopping by his place/Lindsey's place on the drive back so he could pick up his guitar, a case of Natural Light and his dog Jennifer. That little puppy got a lot of attention from hashers who wanted to steal her. Such a cutie. Mixture of a black lab, beagle and 2 other kinds of dogs that I can't remember at the moment.

Anyway, Jonathan strummed the guitar, everyone played with the dog, continued to drink for some reason and then eventually went to bed. All in all, it was a great first day at CoTex! Met a bunch of great folks and was ready for more festivities to come.....

Here are the pics from Friday at CoTex.


Thursday, June 29, 2006

CoTex pre-lube: Thursday - El Paso, TX

So, my step-mom took me to the airport on the evening of June 8 and I met Wet Spot there. Luckily, she called me from Subway where she was getting some dinner because I ended up having her grab me a sandwich as well. Turns out that everything in our brand new little “International” airport in Austin shuts down at 8pm! WTF? So my ritual of going to Schlotzsky’s at ABIA before my flight was messed up. Oh well.

Anyway, we finally got to El Paso after some turbulence and found Dusty waiting for us. The 3 of us headed to our favorite little Tex-Mex hotel, the Mesa Inn. We called Butt Darts from the Border Jumper hash and found out they were at our beloved King’s X. They were supposed to be at some new bar across the street, but it wasn’t open yet. Around 10pm we headed over to King's. We met a bunch of really sweet and fun BJ hashers and they had a bunch of beers waiting for us. They thought there were going to be more than 3 of us. Not to worry….we had no problem finishing off all those pitchers! Next thing I know, there’s this guy with the Shocker Machine! The same one I saw in Mexico during Tex-Mex where the guy wanted us to pay him to shock us. Insane. Well, this apparently was free and somehow he convinced our entire table to hold hands and let this current run through us. Was quite freaky and I, of course, screamed and jumped up from the table. I’m such a whimp. Then it was time for the guys to be all macho and try to outdo each other by having the current turned up higher and higher. Stupid boys.

After many laughs and many, many beers, it was finally time to head home to the hotel so we could get a little rest before our drive to Ruidoso the next morning…we had a big weekend ahead of us!

Here are the pre-lube pics.

Friday, June 23, 2006

The Asians invade Wells Branch!

Many of you know already, but for those of you who don't, Nat & Marisa [I PEE FREELY & FREE MEAT] are opening up a restaurant on Wells Branch along with Marisa's sister, Alisa. It will be a Thai and Japanese restaurant. It is located here. The Chon Som blog was just created and you can find it here.
It's very exciting to watch everything unfold for them since day 1. We had a celebratory happy hour back on June 12 [the day they officially signed the papers] that turned into an all night party!
We were pumped up from the beginning and started ripping down the ugly wall paper that evening. Since then, hashers have been contributing their time and energy into helping them with little tasks as well as big projects. I can't wait to see the final product! It was a little strange at first because it looked like the old owners just up and walked out in the middle of the day and left everything behind. Things are now much more organized and their restaurant is coming together nicely!

Anyway, the name of the restaurant is Chon Som. They are currently scheduled to open in the middle of August, but things seem to be moving along quickly. So who knows, maybe they will open the end of July?? Whoo-hoo!

Keep up the good work everyone! Here are all of my pics of the restaurant.

P.S. For those that go help them out, they've been cooking delicious Thai dinners for everyone. Yum Yum! And how could I forget about the always stocked beer fridge! How else would you repay a hasher?!?

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

666 Hashes

So there I was, the morning of 6-6-06... I could not get out of bed since SLT Fanny and RING AROUND THE PANTY were over at my place the night before and we stayed up way too late, so I ended up running out of the house without packing a hash bag. After work, I stopped by the beginning of the OTR 666 Hash, which started at Lovejoy’s. SOCIAL RETARD and SHE MUSSEL BITCH were already there, as well as SQUEEF. He wasn’t there to run with the girls…he just lives up at LJ’s! BUT, if he was gonna sit at our table, he was gonna have something girly on. So I put some of my tinted Burt’s Beeswax on him…looked quite lovely on him.

Anyway, I was dressed in my work clothes, so I wasn’t running trail. Had a few beers with the girls and then I was then off to the A.S.S. meeting, since it was right around the corner. blASSt ZONE was showing the pictures from the ASS Hunt up on a big screen, so it was fun to laugh at them all again. Several beers later, it was time for my 3rd stop of the night…the guy’s 666 Hash [aka. The Double D Hash]. Their starting point was at the Barfly, but while on the way over I got a call saying they had left and were already at the one and only stop…The Yellow Rose. I wasn’t in the mood for a strip club, but they were having a beer check in the parking lot so I decided to meet up with them and have one beer with them. Once arriving, the guys + SLT FANNY & VAGITARIAN talked me into going inside since we were getting in for free [Thanks FU Knave]. I said I’d have one beer and then jet. That’s exactly what I did. Of course, 1 beer at the Rose is $5.50!

Just before circle was held in the parking lot of the Rose...

My 4th and final stop of the evening was to drive out to the Round Rock Plucker’s. I needed to pick up my bathing suit from HIPPIE SWALLOW, who had picked up a shift out there. I had originally thought I was gonna use their wifi to upload pics and get a bite to eat, but forgot that the RR Pluck closes at midnight…and it was already 11:40pm. So I decided to head home and hit the hay since I was beat. If I had known I'd only need my bathing suit bottoms at CoTex, I wouldn't have made the trip over to get my new swim suit...but that's another story.

Here are the 666 pics.

Sunday, June 18, 2006

Angelina Jolie Birthday Hash

So on June 4, we went to the Angelina Jolie Birthday Hash. Went to the hash, ran a little, walked a little, drank a lot, went to the County Line, tried to go to LaLa's...they're closed on Sunday...ended up at the Poodle Dog Lounge. Good times, good times. Blah, blah, blah. Here are the pics.

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Mad Cowboys/Barfly


So on Friday, June 2, there was a Biker Rally in town. So instead of heading downtown to our beloved Lovejoy's for happy hour, we moved it to the Draught House. Had a couple of beers there and then it was time to head over to the Carousel Lounge for my very first Mad Cowboys show. Man, I am so glad that I went! So many hashers showed up and I had such a great time! If you've never been, they play the first Friday of every month and the lead singer used to be a hasher. Also, they don't serve liquor so you can bring in your own and buy set-ups. Or do what we did and just drink straight from the bottle/flask. :)
Good times, good times.


Oh yeah, and Stella, the waitress, apparently always does a dance for the crowd!
After the show was over, a bunch of us headed over to the Barfly. I had HAPPY CRACK order my drink since he is a regular and they would pour it stronger. Ok, the Barfly already pours stiff drinks, so why did I need the extra strong drink after all the liquor at the Carousel Lounge?! Who knows. Well, I'm told that I tried to go sleep in my car at one point. Guess I knew better to drive, but was tired. Good ol' RING AROUND THE PANTY drove me and Doug over to Lesley's place so I could crash out. But did I?? NO! Doug got out his guitar and started to play along with the music. Then I raided Leslo's fridge and found a hot pocket...damn, those things are good after drinking. I fell asleep on the couch while Doug tried to play my favorite Robert Earl Keen song. A little hard when all he had were the lyrics and no notes to help him!

Here are the rest of the pics.

Monday, June 12, 2006

CoTex Sneak Preview

I still need to post pics from the Mad Cowboys/Barfly night, the June 4 Hash and the 666 Hashes, but here are a few sneak preview pics from CoTex...which, by the way, ROCKED! I met so many awesome folks. Can't wait for the next big weekend event!


CoTex Pre-Lube in El Paso with some Border Jumpers






Wet Spot and @ss Gagger, shortly after arriving to Ruidoso






Heyyyy, Big Gulp, how'd you get your name?!

Friday night pub crawl

This about sums up my weekend!


Saturday trail run - beer check #1


Full Moon check


Sunday goodbyes

Saturday, June 10, 2006

BROWNIE IS A WANKER!


Thursday, June 08, 2006

Memorial Weekend Pics

Pics from Saturday, May 27 on Lake Travis are here.

Pics from Sunday's Club Med Hash #2/C'Em's Birthday Party are here. I didn't make the actual hash due to family in town, but I made it to the end to party!

Lincoln, Beckett & the ASS Hunt

Ok, I know I'm behind again on posting pictures...I'm trying to get a few more posted today before I head [who said head?] out of town today....

So, on Friday, May 19, I was headed to Costco to go shopping for the ASS [Austin Sailing Society] Hunt when I got the call. My A&M buddies Tehra and Joe called to invite me to a little BBQ. Now I knew the night before the Hunt was going to be a busy one, but I hadn't seen these friends since a wedding I was in back in November, and I hadn't seen their kids in almost a year! I swear, once friends get married and have kids, you rarely see them. Tehra and Joe used to be my beer drinking, crazy fun, festival buddies. I always have a blast with them. I really need to make a better effort to see them more. The last time I saw their boys was at Spamarama last year and their youngest boy was 3 weeks old...he is now about to turn 1 year old! So I stopped by their house after shopping for the ASS Hunt and hung out with them for 2 hours. Was a great time! Those little boys are hilarious and are growing up so quickly! I'm sure nobody really cares and you’re wondering where all the pics from the Memorial Weekend hash are, so I'll move on.

Pics are here.

I then went home to pack up some stuff for the fun-filled weekend that was ahead and carted everything over to the Keever’s house around 10pm. We had to finish up the final preparations for the Hunt…make the booty bins, prepare maps, print out the rules, stuff the bags for the Captains, cut out my pirate tattoos, etc. I think we went to sleep around 2am, right?


Arrrgh!

Saturday morning came way too soon for my tired eyes, but it was time to get crackin’. We finally all got ready, loaded up the cars and headed to Marshall Ford Marina to set up. I wasn’t exactly sure what the plan was, but I knew I was supposed to take pictures of everyone and everything all day long. blASSt ZONE shuttled us over to the large Sometimes Island on Batamaran and the picture fun began. Got a lot of shots of all the sailboats coming in to the island to check in, as well as some shots of the naval warfare from GREAT DANE PAIN’S GDMFMB. We also kept checking all of the booty bins that were floating in the water. A couple of them were swiped, so redistribution of the booty had to be done. After that, I pretty much remained on Sometimes Island for the remainder of the warfare. Laughed my arse off when I saw the Mangia boat...

I guess I finally started to drink more heavily once the game part of the day was finished because I didn’t even remember who shuttled me back to the marina until someone told me the next morning. Anyway, back at the marina it was time for dinner, awards and the slide show.

I remember sitting on the side, talking with BONESUCKER, BABY G, Jeff, Larsen and some others. Took some swigs from the liquor bottle…what was it again? Whiskey or rum…who can remember? BONESUCKER somehow talked Larsen out of his shirt…so what occurs? They switch tops. Unfortunately for Larsen, he only gets a bathing suit top out of it! I think he ended up whining about wanting his shirt back, so they switched again. But it was funny for a little bit. Now here is when things start to get very foggy. I heard Rob asking if anyone wanted to go night sailing on Infinity…I immediately jumped up and followed the little group he had assembled. Let’s see….it was Rob & Lynn, Grabber & Ava [sp?], Oldag, PADRE, BONESUCKER, BABY G and myself…anyone else? I can’t recall! Man, night sailing absolutely rocks. So, back to the story…

So BONESUCKER was using my lap as a pillow and dozing in and out of sleep when…whammy! The boat tilted over and she rolled off the seat onto the floor. Guess that woke her up! Next thing I recall was nabbing one of the couch seats to sleep on. Thanks BABY G for letting me borrow your jacket. I still need to clean it for you.

I woke up SUPER early on Sunday morning and wandered the marina, taking a few more pictures of the calm water. Walked all the way around, up and back down to the other side to see if anyone on blASSt ZONE’s boat was awake. No such luck. So I just stretched out on the dock and dozed off for a bit. A little bit later they started waking up and we were wondering where the heck Jeff & Megan went because we could tell their boat was locked up…Jeff was in charge of making his famous breakfast tacos and the natives were getting restless! We finally saw them arrive back at the marina and the breakfast festivities began. But not before crazy Jeff jumped in the water to swim over to his boat due to his laziness at walking up and all the way around the docks!
Check out the concoction he made…man, it was like heart attack in a skillet…but DEE-LISH!

Once breakfast was over and everyone started heading home, blASSt ZONE said he wanted to go sailing, so we rounded up our stuff and set sail. It was myself, CUMONIWANALAYA, blASSt ZONE, JUST BARBARA and Alex. Another gorgeous day.

But wait, there’s more! We were now quite hungry and decided to make cowboy burgers. Those things are scrumptious. By then we were pretty tired and lazy and decided to watch a movie…The Chronicles of Narnia. I actually liked it. Didn’t think I would.

Several hashers are ASSers, so check out all the pics!

Monday, June 05, 2006

Kurt is the Key!


So, back on Saturday, May 13, I went to a graduation party for my buddy Hundl. Ok, his name is Kurt Hundl, but I've always called him by his last name. We go way back to the Fall of 1991 at Texas A&M. Many of you hashers in Austin might recognize him and his girlfriend, JUST APRIL. They were 2 of the 5 virgins that STRAP-ON ELVIS brought out to a STAYFREE trail in the 100 degree heat of the summer. JUST KRISTIN, BITCH, JAMES BITCH, and myself were the others. I remember when all the other regulars were staring at us, asking why on Earth Elvis would bring 5 virgins to a STAYFREE trail, especially without water. But what did we know? Luckily, SOCIAL RETARD and TAF befriended us, helped us find trail when we got lost and TAF gave us cold water from his Camelbak. THANK YOU!!! I mean, it took us 2 hours to get to the 1st beer check...

JUST KURT & JUST APRIL after a hash run

Anyway, Kurt finished up his Masters degree in Juvenile Justice and his sister and girlfriend decided to throw him a party. His sister lives out in BFE off Bee Caves and it started at 6pm, so I skipped going to the lake so I could help him celebrate. He is, afterall, an important key to my new life as a hasher. But that's for later. Anyway.....Hundl's sister knows how to throw a party! There was tons of beer, a margarita machine, tons of delicious appetizers and of course, a kick ass dinner. I believe she got the fajitas from Maudie's. Dee-lish! I also need to remember the beer they got in the keg...it was yummy as well. Something like Warsteiner. Anyway, a good time was had by all. :)

Hundl & Gagger at the Graduation Party

So, back to the reason why Kurt is the key to my life as a hasher....

So there I was, in College Station about 2am, many years ago, at Denny's. Possibly 1999? 2000? I was walking in the door, Hundl was walking out the door. We hadn't seen each other in years. We were both in town for the Aggies home football game, had been out partying and both wanted some late night grub. We discovered that we both now lived in Austin, and only 5 minutes from each other. We met in the Fall of 1991 while working at our first job during school. Anyway, we exchanged numbers that night at Denny's and have been hanging out ever since. I should've paid him rent back then since I was always at his house...sleeping on his couch [sound familiar D&J?]. I became a fan of his softball team, which is named Betty Ford Clinic. Ok, so I liked one of his friends/teammates.... But that's another story. Anyway, each BFC player has a different beer on the front of their shirt and their numbers on the back are BACs. This year the girls are getting shirts with different liquors on them. Not sure what mine is gonna be because the ones I requested weren't available and April already called Jager! Something funny they do at the end of each game is give the Jackass Award. Everyone votes...players and fans. The person gets the most votes has to drink a nasty beer that night. At the next game, he has to wear the pink Jackass shirt and the pink flamingo hat at his first at bat. It's quite humorous. This pic was at an all day tournament. I drank a little too much and decided I wanted to try on the hat!

Jen in the Jackass Hat!


Well, Lavaca Street Bar used to be their softball sponsor, but then one year a little restaurant named Plucker's became their sponsor. After every game we'd go to the 183 location to drink and eat. This began my love for that place. And this was before they expanded and had the cool bar section...and when Thomas was a waiter. He was our favorite. Now Thomas is a manager at the Rio Grande location and we never see him. :(

This is Thomas

When Thomas wasn't waiting tables anymore, my favorite waiter became Jeremy. But now he is a manager over at the new Round Rock store!

And here is Jeremy

Here are some pics after a tourney...look at the progression of drunkenness. This was a rough day. The tournament started around 9-10am. I started drinking shortly thereafter, plus, there was an Astros playoff on TV as well as a Longhorn football game. You better believe I brought my TV and an extension cord to the fields! Someone else did as well, so they had the Longhorn game on while I was watching the 'Stros between softball games. April carried out her mom's tradition of doing shots after every UT touchdown. Now, I wasn't rooting for the Longhorns, but I did take a shot everytime they scored. [Seriously, BROWNIE!] Who is gonna pass up liquor? After Team Betty Ford Clinic won the whole tournament, we headed over to Plucker's to celebrate...with shots, of course. And then moved on to Graffiti's!




Holy smokes! Why was I taking more shots?!!

Hundl at Graffiti's

Back to the story....One softball game, this girl named Kristin came out to watch Kurt play. We started chatting and became instant friends and started hanging out. Then I met one of her good friends...this guy named Todd. Turns out, he was a manager at the Rio Grande Plucker's.

Kristin, Kurt and Jen, 7 weeks before we started hashing, at the Rio Grande Plucker's

One day, Todd told me about this group he was involved with that ran for beer. I thought it sounded awesome and wanted to hear more. He told me all about G and Kuala Lumpur, etc. BUT, he didn't invite us out and I didn't know about the web site. I remember exactly where I was when he first told me about the Hash...we were having a few beers at Graffiti's...great little dive bar around the corner from my condo. Anyway, while at Plucker's one night, we all decided to finally check it out. So on August 21, 2005, this Todd guy, who you all know as STRAP-ON ELVIS, took 5 virgins to the hash...and I've been hooked ever since. Only 2 of his original virgins still hash, but I'm currently working on JUST KURT and JUST APRIL...someday they will return! And maybe I can even get JUST KRISTIN to return.

So, without Kurt, I never would have gone to Plucker's, never would have met Kristin, never would have met Todd, and never would have heard about the hash! Ok, so maybe some chance encounter would have eventually led me to the hash, but maybe not. So STRAP-ON actually took me to the hash, but I wouldn't be a hasher, wouldn't have met all of my wonderful hasher friends and wouldn't be writing some shitty blog right now, had I not run into good ol' Hundl in good ol' Aggieland several years ago. :)
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